I grew up as a young child on a dairy farm. When the wind and location are right, the “smells” of a local dairy in the valley bring me back to my childhood. We all know that dairy farms are full of cows and milk. This means they are also full of feed, water, and a natural byproduct we call manure. Collecting and processing manure can be a delicate challenge for dairy farmers. But for me as a kid, it provided a playground. More specifically, my older brother and I would sneak onto the large concrete holding pens after the cows had left. We would ride our BMX bikes with reckless abandon. Riding on the well-lubricated surface made the typical “skids” and “peel-outs” all the more enjoyable.
At the end of our unconventional revelry, we would march our way back to the house covered in cow manure and urine. My mom would see us coming, and quickly grab a high-pressured garden hose and spray us down for several minutes. We would endure a long-winded lecture in our soaking wet clothes. And when that didn’t prevent future funfests in the Cowpen, eventually our bikes were taken away. What could make 2 kids enjoy something so disgusting and unsanitary? After living on a dairy farm for a while, the abundance of “poo” quickly became normalized. At least for my brother and I, it required too much effort to stay clear of it, and thus we even pursued it. My parents of course were much more civilized and consistently maintained a healthy separation from the filth. Now as an adult, I can’t imagine choosing to lather up in cow excrement, much less enjoy it! This illustration provides a very clear application to our lives as believers, and our roles as parents. Our children are subjected to a world that is full of filth. It is so easy for this filth to become normalized in their world, and so easy for them to give in to the perverted attraction and even pursue it. Our role as parents is to model, instruct, and provide boundaries consistent with God’s Word. This requires constant and patient attention. Have you ever tried to scrub weeks-old cow manure out of clothes? It can be both challenging and uncomfortable. It is important to actively disciple every day! We recently did a reset of some boundaries in our own home. Generally, boundaries can be enlarged as children mature, but sometimes the rate of decline of our culture exceeds the rate of maturity of our children. Sometimes a long-winded lecture and a high-powered garden hose can do the trick. Other times, restricting access until maturity is evident is our responsibility. But please know, if you see me wearing muddy boots, be assured it is just dirt. My daughter was recently given an interesting assignment in her freshman College Psychology class. They were required to identify a common social norm, and then to break that norm on campus. Some examples were walking backward all day, wearing a formal dress to class, or never sitting down in class. I was excited to brainstorm ideas with my daughter and to even be a con-conspirator in the plan.
We decided that I would call her in the middle of one of her classes and she would have her ringtone unmuted and obnoxiously loud. She would answer the phone in class and even put me on speakerphone for our short conversation. This past week we executed the plan with perfection! Sure, I might have stayed on the phone longer than necessary in an attempt to embarrass her a bit. But we were both impressed with her courage and enjoyed the reaction of her classmates and professor! (apparently, this is a well-known assignment on campus and thus a lot of understanding is provided) For some of us, this assignment would be a welcome and fun exercise. For others, it could be terrifying and anxiety-inducing!. Regardless, it would require a deliberate and public effort to stand out from the crowd. What an excellent illustration of our Christian testimony! The apostle Paul reminds us that eventually every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord (Phil. 2:9-11). We know we are on the winning team and the battle has already been won. We do not have to wait to join the rest of the unbelieving world to testify of His Lordship. We already know that He is Lord and can show it today! So the next time you see a courageous person breaking a social norm, let the Holy Spirit remind you how Jesus has broken the normal life of sin and death and provided a rich abundant life of joy and fruit. And then turn up your speakerphone and let the world hear it! A couple of years ago we were blessed with a trip to Hawaii. While there was much to experience, our daily rhythm generally included visiting a beach. My son and I would spend hours boogie boarding in the waves.
The waves we found were satisfactory, but became a bit mundane after a couple of days. Then a high-surf warning came upon us. We were so excited! The waves at the first beach we went to were actually closed to tourists, and for good reason. They were huge! The waves at the second beach were fortunately open “at your own risk.” The experience was thrilling! Sure we broke a few boards, and tumbled underwater in the sand a few times! But what a great memory. The circumstances in our lives may be very similar to the waves in the ocean. Comfortable circumstances, which rarely exist, can quickly become boring and unfruitful. Dangerous circumstances should have limits placed around them and avoided. God is generally in the business of preparing thrilling circumstances for our days! Jesus came to give us a thrilling and abundant life. The apostle Paul reminds us through Jesus we can do all things. James even encourages us to rejoice in our challenges, as they bring so much life! May we embrace the thrill of the waves of life. Whether simply getting all of your kids to bed on time, or keeping the refrigerator stocked, or taking the time to counsel and pray during frustrating situations. These experiences of every day, even the terrifying ones, can draw us closer to our Savior and closer to each other. As a result, our faces will shine not only with the radiance of the Hawaiian sun, but the radiance of His glory! Early on in high school, I was extremely envious of one of my classmates. He was a 6’5” strong and fast track star who was living the life I was supposed to live. My envious thoughts were at times all-consuming and generally destructive. Finally, God got my attention. In my senior year, I broke my wrist in the 2nd game of my basketball season. I was devastated. Worse than that, some little freshman was taking my place as the starting point guard. Once again, envy was lurking at the door.
Fortunately, God revealed to me this destructive flaw in my life. I watched as other teammates and friends demonstrated their own envy of this new freshman as they belittled him. Through God’s help, I decided I was going to do the opposite. I was going to admire him and support him. I began to mentor him and protect him from all the distractions competing for his attention and identity. God began to teach me the difference between sinful envy and Godly jealousy. God tells us that he is a “jealous God” (Exodus 34:14) and a “consuming fire” (Hebrews 12:28-29). This Godly jealousy protects His sons and daughters from all rivals that attempt to replace His rightful place as King of our lives. The apostle Paul modeled that we should be jealous for each other with this Godly jealousy (2 Cor. 11:2), striving to guard one another from all rivals attempting to replace God on the throne of our lives. The antidote to sinful envy is admiration, mentoring, and understanding our identity in Christ. As a high school senior, as I began to prayerfully support my freshman replacement, God taught me to begin to admire what He was doing through Him. It allowed me to learn from my friend and through the situation. I also began to feel more comfortable in my own skin as I began to realize who I was. I was not the freshman basketball star or the 6’5” star track athlete. In my attempt to be somebody I wasn’t, I was not fulfilling God’s purposes for me. Being envious of others was dishonoring to God. He bought me at a price, and He was calling me to glorify Him in my body (1 Cor. 6:20). We praise our Sovereign and Holy God who is jealous for us! May we be jealous for each other and our children, protecting them from all worldly rivals. And when sinful envy creeps in, may we be quick to identify it and replace it with admiration. Our jealous God is eager to take the temptations of sinful envy to remind us of our eternal significance as children of God! There is certainly no shortage of access to “reviews” and “opinions” of products or services in today’s culture. Whether on Amazon, Yelp, Social Media, or just a Google search, it is easy to find out what others think about something. While helpful at times, it can also be infuriating. Just when you think you have a strong consensus on a topic, a few more minutes of research and now you believe the opposite!
Another option is to pursue more personal and accountable sources through personal friends and family. When it comes to movies and restaurants, these opinions may be about as valuable as the cost of a night out. But areas of higher priority, and the opinions expressed about them, carry a much greater weight. As followers of Jesus, one of our greatest priorities is the parenting of our children. The choices we make for our children are significant to us, including who spends time with our children when they are not at home. New families interested in Crosshill Christian School can learn more about our community through our website, campus tours, and interviews with the staff. Yet the most accurate picture they receive about CCS is speaking with you, our current families. There is no better way to predict their potential future experience then to hear about the experiences of current families. To that end, the large majority of prospective families reaching out to us have been sent by current families. Thank you! While we still have a lot of work to do to more consistently meet our mission, close to 400 families have contacted us this winter interested in our community. The real excitement comes from being an active part of God’s design for community and the discipleship of all of His children! May we continue to bring glory to Him as we share all that He is doing in our lives. One summer my parents thought it would be a great idea for me to join the swim team. The problem was I didn’t know how to swim! It was both a challenging and fruitful summer. After learning the basic mechanics of swimming, my next task was to swim in a straight line. Everytime I practiced in an open pool or pond, I would always swim in a crooked line. Thankfully, our swim pool had lanes with floating lane dividers. While painful and shocking to accidentally hit, they provided me a boundary to stay in my lane. Without them I would have constantly been running over other swimmers, assuming I could have kept up with them.
I think I can swim in a straight line now, but as a child, I was not equipped in that area. Boundaries are so helpful for our children. They help our children mature and improve, just as the land dividers did for me as a swimmer. Still, I was not always a fan of the swim pool boundaries. They separated me from some of my friends, and prevented us from recklessly jumping into the pool cannonball style. But the purpose of the swim team was to help me grow as a competitive swimmer and those boundaries guided me toward that goal. The purpose of parenting is to help our children grow as faithful followers of Jesus Christ. We are responsible to provide those boundaries that will guide them toward that goal in every area of their lives. Gratefulness or agreement for these boundaries is generally not required. Our role as parents is to do what our children need, not always what they want. As our children mature, this external control we provide as parents develops into wise internal self-control that will guide our children beyond their years in our home. My favorite swimming stroke was always the backstroke (probably because I could actually breathe while swimming). To prevent swimmers from running unknowingly into the pool wall, flags are stretched above the pool on each end a certain distance from the wall so swimmers can know when to prepare to touch the wall. As parents, we are called to impart wisdom to our children, teaching them to recognize the flags that will prevent them from hitting the wall. I pray that your parenting goes swimmingly! |
Adam Kronberger
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